Wednesday, July 05, 2006

Dancing with the Infinite


Wednesday, July 5, 2006 ~ Sedona, Arizona

As I lie in bed this morning thinking about my life in these times, the image that comes to me is of a deck of cards tossed in the air. It's a slow-motion vision of cards lazily somersaulting over each other, not yet ready to fall to earth.

I've had that image before. And the sense that has always accompanied it is that everything is in limbo, that I'm waiting for the cards to fall into whatever the new pattern of my life will be.

This morning, though, my interpretation is different. Disconcertingly different.

What if, I ask myself, this somersaulting limbo is the new pattern? What if the cards don't fall to earth because they're dancing in a different vibration...and I'm being asked to dance with them?

In the past, I would wait patiently for the new pattern, even as I tried to figure out what it would look like, where the dominant focus would be.

Would it be these writings? My fiction? My screen writing?

Would it be my groups, sessions and teleconference? And would that focus be trained on singing/sound healing or spoken inspiration?

This morning, in an Aha! that I'm still integrating, I realize that my old response is no longer appropriate.

First, it denies the present moment in favor of some indeterminate future one.

Second, it assumes that anything will ever be fixed again, even for a moment.

Third, it denies the increasing multidimensionality of my nature.

The truth is that any attempt to figure things out repudiates the present moment and the call to surrender fully to it. The truth is that nothing will ever be fixed again, at least not in the old ways I remember. The truth is that all forward motion points to fluidity and surrender.

The truth is that destination -- any destination -- is not the point.

Where I'll drop anchor, what my work will look like, whether my books are ever published or screenplays are ever filmed is immaterial...even as the less-evolved parts of me protest.

As all great spiritual teachers repeatedly remind us, only the journey matters...be it my interstate highway journey, my writing journey or the journey of Radical Evolution I wrote about in this week's newsletter (and will be working with in next week's teleconference).

I'm feeling that focus on the journey more and more fully in recent times, and it's not always comfortable. Parts of me gaze longingly and naively back to a sense of stability, control and destiny that is more illusory than ever.

More and more of me realizes that those cards aren't coming down...perhaps ever. Even if they do, some day, all that can matter is this moment, when they continue to dance in ever-shifting patterns and beckon me to join in.

Truly, I have no choice but to answer the call and dance with them.

4 comments:

Terri Webb said...

I still have a problem with this line of thinking - especially in the new energy. My understanding of the new energy is that those of us aware of it need only to decide and focus on our passions. What do you do that really makes you feel alive, you ask yourself. When that answer comes to you, you put energy into doing whatever it is.

We are manifestors. That means we are manifesting our life every second. We need intention in order to manifest. It is not a question - "Can I be allowed to do this?" It is a statement of what you need to do to make your heart sing.

We are in the middle of the biggest war that ever played out on this planet: The war of dark over light. This means that there are a lot of dark energies looking for homes that continually get in the way of those of us of the light. Not all things go smoothly at this time. There is the difference between the 3rd and 5th dimensions as well. What used to work in 3D doesn't work any more in 5D. The 3D systems are still hanging on and one must work around them.

If you feel, in your heart, that you have a plan that you know is right for what you want to do to live your passion, THEN JUST START HEADING IN THAT DIRECTION. Never mind that EVERY little faction of it doesn't line up perfectly. Some times our lesson to learn is "to persevere". The time when the road was marked by ease is over for now.

When I relocated to New Mexico from California last year, I had known for 4 years I was going to do it. I just waited for the timing to be right and did it. In the process, I did nothing but jump over continuous hurdles. Problems with movers, problems with buyers, problems with sellers, problems with loan officers - nobody seemed to know what to do to make the transition easy. When the dark knows you are coming in to make it light, they fight you. Those energies try to keep you off of your course because then you can't bring the light.

Find your passion, know it's right and go forward; never mind the road blocks. Life still isn't perfect.

Namaste

Anonymous said...

Dear Terri,

The so-called "new energy" is not a stagnant entity. More than ever, vibrations are accelerating more and more rapidly and what was a fixed "truth" yesterday may not be quite so fixed today and even less so tomorrow.

When I wrote of my choice for Denver, what was clear to me (but did not make it into the piece) was that such a choice would have been appropriate at another time, but that my vibration, if you will, had since bypassed not Denver but that variety of choice.

More important though, and I think I mentioned this in our last correspondence, is the discernment between what our human self wants (and may think has a passion for) and what truly makes our divine sing.

This is where surrender comes in. My surrender is to the song of the expanding divine with me, which is not always something that my human self thinks he wants or even has an awareness of.

By surrendering to this higher imperative (which is not in any sense an external imperative), I am increasingly open to my passion and its fullest/deepest expression, however that shows up.

Yes, it's all about choice, in one sense. But it's not about human choice; it's about divine choice. It's about a choice for what we are evolving into, not what we are evolving from.

The distinctions can be subtle, but they're present nonetheless.

Yes, we are creating our life in every moment. But the question remains: From what place/energy/vibration are we creating it? My choice would be to create it from as close to divine consciousness as I can manage in each moment,

You say, "We are in the middle of the biggest war that ever played out on this planet: The war of dark over light."

Here's where I have a fundamental disagreement. Though it may, once again, be a difference in semantics more than one of substance.

In my world view, there is truly nothing outside of us, which means any so-called war is occurring within, which is where whatever dark energies there are also reside.

To me, this dark vs. light languaging simply prolongs the experience and expression of duality that is an old paradigm.

The best way for light to prevail, if that's even the appropriate word, is for us to bring light to the darkness within ourselves. One way to do that is by surrendering to the light, to the divine expression, to the radical evolution we are all now experiencing.

You write: "When the dark knows you are coming in to make it light, they fight you. Those energies try to keep you off of your course because then you can't bring the light."

Once again I see it differently, perhaps — not as an external darkness but as the fearful (hence dark) parts within that are afraid to move forward.

Having said all that, no one truly knows what precisely is going on or where we're headed. All any of us can do is the best we can do with the highest wisdom we can access from moment to moment.

Namaste,
Mark David

Terri Webb said...

So from your statement, I believe you see the expression of duality as an old paradigm. Then why is it that you continue to see your decision making as coming from your human self and not your Godhead. It's that an expression of duality?
I still don't believe this means you are relegated to wandering the planet if it doesn't agree with you. If there is no duality, then any choice you make comes from your Godhead and will be supported. Again, I feel you are discounting the effects of the lingering 3D energies vs the 5D energies. These are not just internal struggles. I believe they are real and account for the pings in the road.
Concerning your choice to land in Denver; I feel safe in saying that at your vibrational level, nothing should come to you from another time line. There is no purpose in that. Did you feel it solidly in your gut or were you guessing?
On your discussion about moving ahead: I feel that this is where Faith comes in. There is a difference between moving ahead physically and moving ahead on a Project. Sometimes we move ahead physically so we don't have to move ahead on a project we are afraid will fail.
I myself have a pretty solid sense in general terms of "Where we are heading". How do we get there? That is the question. The "How" I feel, is where we let things unfold in their own terms. I still feel confident that you must set your sites on a definite path.
If I may, let me pass on a true story about a very gifted man. His name was Ian. He still has a website called Mayan Majix. It is continuing on in his name thru close friends of his. Ian had a burning passion to pass on information about the Mayan calendar. If you visit his website, his story is there. I also had email contact with Ian. Soon after I saw him live in Jan of 2005, he was diagnosed with Cancer in his throat & jaw. He was 59 which translates to the fact that he was in his second Saturn return - a vicarious time to say the least. Ian had a Southern Baptist Mother who taught him that money was the Devils tool. You may have run across him as he lived in Sedona around the turn of the century for a while. Well, he threw himself into his passion. Like you, things would turn south for him when it was time to move on. From correspondence with him, I realized that one of his obstacles to overcome in this life was some of the teaching he received from his Baptist Mother. He never accomplished this and died at 59. One would think that a man such as he, on a spiritual journey of seemingly great magnitude, would be around for awhile to continue to share his wisdom. His spiritual journey was only part of his life. I believe everyone still came down here with a game plan to continue to fine tune their understanding of mundane living. The only people excluded from this seem to be some of the Guru's in India who brought the knowledge of how to change their physical body movements and exist with out food. Just food for thought...............

Anonymous said...

Dear Terri,

Different perspectives, same ultimate truth.

The most important thing for any of us is connect as fully as we can with our highest truth and act from that place. At a human level, we won't always get it right, though at a divine level there is neither right nor wrong, simply an inevitable progress toward that which our human minds can not yet fully perceive.

Blessings on your expression of that universal journey,
Mark David